A rather disturbing yet entertaining police report claims that actor Jason London not only got into a bar fight in Arizona last weekend, he also crapped his pants in the back of a police car. Intrigued? So are we.

TMZ reports that police found London outside Martini Ranch in Scottsdale, Arizona, nursing a swollen eye around 1:45 a.m. Sunday. The injury was allegedly a parting gift from the bar's bouncer, who claims London sneezed on him inside the bar, refused to apologize, then punched him in the face. The bouncer responded by throwing London out of the bar; the actor sustained his facial injuries in the process.

Police claim London's aggression returned when paramedics tried to treat him at the scene. One officer reportedly delivered "a knee strike to London's right thigh so they could seat him on the ground," according to the celebrity gossip publication. London proceeded to call one of the officers a "f**king hillbilly" and was eventually arrested for disorderly conduct, fighting and assault.

The 40-year-old actor allegedly continued to verbally bash police while en route to the police station: "Guess what fa**ot? I f***ing love this. I f***ing own you guys so hard. I'm rich and I'm a motherf***ing famous actor! F***ing look me up, bitch." He continued: "It smells like s**t in your car and your breath smells like diarrhea."

And then he allegedly leaned to the left and defecated in his pants.